Deirdre's Diary

fuck.

fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck.


dude i thought i could trust him. this is why i don't do that. god FUCK dude ahhhh god fuck im so mad. ugh. why do i do this....

i suppose i'll unlock this. 

post if you want to my little children.

awesome. just fucking awesome.

i can't believe that happened. i'm going through with it. i can't believe that it happened again. i feel so... betrayed. even if that's not what happened... i just thought things could maybe go right for once. apparently not. fuck. goddamn. 

why. just why. i can't even think. how am i supposed to study for my finals. i have this on my mind and i don't even know whats going to happen. im going to fail everything..... as usual

that's all i am is a failure. fucking hell. god. i'm seriously the worst human ever. i can't even keep her as my friend for a year.... things have to go bad. i think it would be easier for her if i wasn't in the picture. maybe i just won't do band next year. i'm sure a lot of people will be happy about that. i don't know what else i'm gonna do though..

*sigh*
i just wish things would work out.....

i am so happy that i finally got to work with food and understand it. i was really dreading going to work and im glad i went...

i'll be gone for a few days, but i will be back.

that few days.......


that was life changing. i'm never going to think something again. i just... wow.

i don't want to do anything else today. i just want to go to rocky horror picture show with my friends and then get to sleep. i want a stress free day. i can't wait for lunch but guys i think i passed the test i just took. i realized that if i apply myself i can understand it. i know it sounds obvious but i forget a lot of times that i'm not stupid. so what i like about algebra two (which isn't a lot) is that this lesson is completely different from the last lesson, so since i had a rough first lesson the second one is way different and i love it. understanding lessons is great. 


plus i think just.... if he forgives me everythings going to be ok.

it's hard to tell what i'm even doing anymore. what is going on... seriously.

im so tired. so sleepy and mentally tired. god

i guess it's complicated anymore. i don't want to go to work tonight because i don't want to have to work with the manager and i don't want a repeat of last night. i just wish everything worked all the time at that store... i mean.... gosh. i just feel like if the drink machine didn't have to be defrosted every fucking hour things would be better.... i wouldn't have to deal with rude customers.

but i guess since i get to work with one of my friends it's gonna be ok since she's funny. i wouldn't even mind doing dishes with her since we can jsut talk. but it's a friday and i don't want to work it... :/

every one of my friends is finding a significant other and im just here like waddup

god im tired.

looks like i'm the only admin for about a week. maybe we might have someone else step in.. just in case

I went to rocky horror picture show and won the costume contest.

i dyed my hair again. i'm not sure how i feel about the cut though, it looks a little sloppy, but thats no big deal.

it's kind of funny how someone notices that we're not friends anymore.

i have no interest in becoming friends with you again. i will, however sit by you so it will make the teacher happy.

my grades are getting so bad......